The Mystery Guest Fanfiction

The Mystery Guest

Ellens POV

Opening the car door and stepping out into the parking lot of the studio I had the sense that today was not going to go my way. I’ve already spilt coffee all down me and the traffic has been horrendous this morning. I take a deep breath, grab my things from the passenger seat and head into the building.

“Morning Ellen!” Jeannie exclaims loudly from down the corridor.

“Morning Jeannie” I laugh. I’m so grateful to have such an amazing crew here. Even when I’m having a bad day like today it’s still fun to come into work. I don’t think I’d still be here ten seasons on if it wasn’t for the staff.

I walk up the stairs and past the offices when I hear Mary shouting my name from inside her office. I peak my head around her door to see what she wants.

“Morning Ell” she says.

“Morning Mary, you okay?”

“Yeah don’t worry I just need to talk to you later about a guest who wants to come on the show. What time’s best to pop round? Before the morning meeting?”

“Yeah sure that’s fine, I just need to make one phone call first but then pop round as soon as”

“Great, you go get ready”

“Thanks Mary” I say and head towards my office.

20 Minutes later…

“Okay thanks, yeah that’s great. See you soon Jimmy” I say placing the phone down as Mary walks into the office closing the door behind her which is strange as our doors are usually open all the time here. I realise it must be a very controversial guest and that I need to make the final decision so I walk around the desk and take a seat next to her on the sofa.

“So, who’s the mystery guest?” I joke.

“I don’t think your going to be laughing when I tell you who it is”

“Oh come on…they can’t be that bad!”

“Anyway this morning I received a call from an agent represent Anne Heche - ”

“No. No way!” I interrupt immediately standing up from my chair. “Who does she think she is? We haven’t spoken in years and what she expects to just saunter onto my show and expect me to promote her new escapade?”

“Wait, calm down Ell. I know it’s not exactly the ideal guest” she says standing up trying to comfort me but I pull away, walk over towards the window and interrupt her again.

“Look any other guest is welcome you know that Mary but I just I can’t drag that back up again especially on national TV”

“I know it would be hard but maybe it’s time you talked and got some closure? Even if it is on national TV.”

“I don’t know Mary. It’s a private issue between the two of us. You know how I feel about making my private life public!”

“Yeah but you can show the public and the media especially that things have settled for you now and that you’ve fully moved on. Otherwise you know what she’s like with the media, they’ll know you declined her offer in half an hour and then you’re going to look like the bad person.”

“Goddammit this woman just loves to screw with me doesn’t she!”

“Hey calm down, look it’s five minutes of your life and we can get her away from the studio as soon as possible”

“Look I can’t say yes now Mary. I’ll have to think about it and talk to Portia.”

“Of course, I wasn’t expecting an answer now don’t worry. Just let me know in your own time yeah? I’ll give her agent a call back and say I didn’t get chance to talk to you about it then I’ll ring again when you’ve made a decision” she says heading for door to my office.

“Thanks Mary. I’ll just be a few minutes and I’ll meet you in the meeting room” I say.

The rest of the day has gone more smoothly but I can’t stop thinking about the decision I have to make. I mean what is Portia going to say? How am I going to sit opposite her on TV and remain calm? I inform Mary that I will speak to Portia tonight and give her a decision in the morning before saying good night to the rest of my staff and heading home. I decided it was best to speak to Portia in person about this rather than over the phone but now I’m dreading the look on her face when I have to ruin our dinner by telling her.

Chapter 2

Portias POV

I am busy making our tea when Ellen get’s home. I hear the front door go and quickly finish stirring the saucepan expecting my usual catch up with Ell about our days. Once I have finished stirring I leave the saucepan to simmer and head out of the kitchen into the hallway expecting to see Ellen finishing up taking her shoes off. But when I enter the hall I can’t see any sign of her.

“Ell?” I say worrying that someone has broken into the house.

“Hey, I’m in the lounge” I barely hear her voice but I can tell she has something on her mind. I walk into the lounge and see her collapsed onto the sofa with her head in her hands.

“Hey, baby are you okay?” I say walking over to her and rubbing my hand on her back.

“Yeah, sorry babe I have stuff on my mind. How about I fill you in over dinner yeah?”

“Okay, I’d better get it ready before it burns. You coming?” I say before noticing that the cat’s have come to greet Ellen again as usual. I giggle to myself knowing exactly what she is about to say.

“What?” she asks confused.

“Oh I just know what your about to say is all” I giggle again.

“Oh” she mumbles.

“Hey, look I’m only messing with you. You go feed the cat’s and I’ll get the tea ready yeah?”

“Yeah okay” I give her a quick peck on the lips before returning to the kitchen and dishing the tea up. I walk into the dining room and get a pleasant surprise when I see that Ellen is sat at the table waiting for her tea. I serve it up and take a seat opposite her. We sit in silence for a while but I can tell that Ellen obviously has a lot on her mind so I try to probe her to share it with me.

“What’s up babe?” I ask concernedly.

“Just the day from hell is all babe don’t worry about it!”

“No come on tell me I might be able to cheer you up a bit”

“Well there is something I need to ask you” she says before letting a huge sigh out of her mouth.

“Hey, babe” I say finishing my last mouthful and moving round onto the seat next to her. I grab her hand after she finishes her food and she turns to face me.

“You know I wouldn’t ask you this if I didn’t think it might finally put an end to the trouble she’s caused in my life?”

“Of course babe, why who is it and what do they want you to do?”

“Well..Mary had a call this morning from a agent representing Anne asking if she can come on the show for an interview”

“Oh” I say a little tacken aback. “But why would she want to come on, I thought she knew things between you were long over?”

“Well apparently she wants to settle things once and for all. But I know what she’s like Port she never wants to settle things” Ellen says using her hands to show her sarcasm for her wanting to settle things.

“Look Ell I’ll support you whatever you want to do.”

“I know you will Port. It’s just well Mary thinks it might be a good idea just to show the press there’s no bad blood between us anymore and if I do decline that she’ll be straight to the papers saying I refused to interview her.”

“Hmm…maybe it’s not a bad idea as long as she does want to settle things?”

“I guess but I don’t want to cause anymore trouble for us especially in the media. I know how much you value your privacy and I don’t want to drag you into the media babe.”

“Hey Ell don’t worry about me. If it goes wrong and we end up on the front page of the papers then who cares?”

“Hmm…I guess”

“I’ll be there anyway when the interview is recorded to support you if you do go ahead with it yeah?”

“Okay, thanks babe.”

“Just have a think about it yeah and let me know.”

“I will do don’t worry. Thank you Port. Come here” she says grabbing the collar of my shirt and pulling me into her. I feel her lips brush up against mine and I can taste the wine she has been drinking. I run my lip along her bottom lip licking off the last remnants of the wine before entering my tongue into her mouth. I feel her relax and let out a small moan before I pull away before I run out of breath.

“Mmmm God. I love you.”

“Aww Ell I love you too. Come on lets get these plates cleaned up and go and relax on the couch ready to watch Scandal” We clean up the table and the rest of the night passes pretty quickly. When Scandal finishes I look over towards the clock then back to Ellen.

“Come on then babe lets go to bed yeah?”

“Port, before we go to bed.”

“Yeah”

“I think I’m gonna say yes to this stupid interview. But I need to make sure you’re definitely okay with it first?”

“Of course babe I support you whatever. I think it’s a good idea too anyway it’ll be good to sort things with her.”

“Thank you, I’ll tell Mary tomorrow.”

Chapter 3

Ellen’s POV

The next morning I am setting off towards the office when I get a call from a number I don’t recognise.

“Hello?” I say answering the phone.

“Hey, Is Ellen Degeneres there?” says a deep voice I don’t recognise.

“Speaking”

“Oh Hi Ellen, it’s Anne Heche’s manager here”

“Oh right”

“I was just ringing to see if you had made a decision as to whether Anne could get a slot on your show or not? It’s just we’re working on a short timeframe in terms of promoting her new show before it airs”

“For fucks sake” I mutter under my breath without thinking.

“Excuse me?” I hear the voice on the other end say.

“Sorry, I’m driving someone cut me up” I say managing to brush off my outburst. “Look, I haven’t had the meeting with my producers about this yet. We were hoping to meet up this morning and make a decision so I can’t say yes or no at this point I’m afraid. Mary will be sure to let you know as soon as the decision has been made though.”

“Oh okay, thanks Ellen.”

“It’s okay! Bye” I say before quickly hanging up the phone not wishing to speak to this man for any longer. I sigh before pulling into the car park of the lot and heading inside.

5 minutes later…

“Mary?” I say knocking on her closed office door.

“Come in!” I hear her say before I open the door and head over to the chair on the opposite side of her desk whilst she finishes her phone call.

“…okay thank you bye” she says before hanging the phone up. “Sorry about that Ell, what can I do for you?”

“I think I’ve made a decision about Anne.”

“And…”

“Well I thought I had until ten minutes ago when I got a call from her manager!”

“Oh no, I told him not to pursue the matter and wait until we’d made a decision. What did he say?”

“Oh he was just desperate to get an answer from me” I say sarcastically. “Anyway I told him we would get back to him today.”

“So what have you decided?”

“Well I don’t really think I’ve got much choice but to say yes really have I?”

“You have Ell, don’t think like that. I just think it’s easier to say yes”

“Yeah I know that, it’s not you Mary don’t worry. But yeah you can give him a ring, try and arrange it as soon as possible. I want to get it over with!” I say before rising from the chair and heading for the door.

“Thanks, Ell. I hope this goes well.”

“Me too Mary. Me too” I say before heading out of her office and in the direction of my own.

Chapter 4

A few weeks later…

* BEEP BEEP BEEP*

I roll over away from Portia, who is still sound asleep in my arms, to turn off the horrendous noise coming from the alarm. To this day I still don’t know how Portia can sleep straight through it. I roll back to her and watch her sleeping for a little while appreciating the down time I have before I have to get up. I always set my alarm a little earlier than necessary so I get this time to relax before the day starts as I am so busy during the rest of the day. Today especially I need to relax as I have this interview with Anne. I have been dreading it since the moment I agreed to do it. Portia has decided to come with me to the studio as moral support even after I tried to persuade her out of it. I just hope that if Anne is planning anything it doesn’t involve Portia, she’s been through too much to get dragged into problems from my past. After ten minutes I have to get up otherwise I am going to be late for work so I gently wake Portia and place my lips onto hers.

“mmmm. Morning baby” she says.

“Morning” I say smiling at her.

“How long have you been awake?” she says groggily.

“The alarm only went off ten minutes ago babe it’s okay we’re not late but we need to get up now really”

“Ah that’s okay. Were you watching me sleep again?”

“Possibly…” I say pausing and smirking at her shyly.

“Ellen! Why didn’t you wake me up?”

“Hey I can’t help it! You’re just too beautiful and I was enjoying watching you sleep”

“Ahh stop it” she says playfully hitting my arm.

“Anyway come on lets get up” I say dragging her into a sitting position in the bed. We both have a quick shower and head downstairs. Portia makes us both some breakfast whilst I feed the animals and give them some fuss. I walk into the kitchen and take a seat at the breakfast bar opposite Portia who is putting some spread onto our toast. I take the piece she has already spread and take a bite.

“Hey that ones mine!” she says laughing.

“Oh well..finders keepers”

“It’s a good job I made enough” she laughs and looks up at me. For a moment I am once again mesmerised by her beauty as I can see the happiness in her eyes.

“I love you Port”

“Aww, Ell I love you too” she says walking around to me with her plate.

“Honestly, I couldn’t be happier than I am right now. I just hope Anne doesn’t do anything today to ruin it.”

“Hey Ell” she says putting her plate back down onto the breakfast bar behind me and placing her hands on my shoulders. “Look at me” she instructs as I raise my head. “Whether Anne says or does anything in the interview has no affect on our lives what so ever okay?”

“I guess”

“Honestly, Ell what can she say that will effect us?”

“Port, this woman will make up anything. I know her and I know that this is not some attempt to reconcile our differences as she likes to put it. I just hope she doesn’t hurt you is all.”

“Nothing that woman can say will ever hurt us. As for me well if she says anything then I know it’s false as I’ve only ever met her once!”

“hmm okay, anyway we’d better get a move on otherwise we are going to be late!”

1 hour later…

I jump out of the car and run around to open Portia’s door for her. I lock the car up and we make our way into the studio hand in hand.

“Morning Ell, Morning Portia” I hear Andy shout down from the top of the stairway.

“Morning Andy!” we both shout up. When we reach the top of the staircase I see the writers are already making their way into the morning meeting.

“I better go straight into the meeting babe we must be a bit late. Either that or everyone’s running early today. You coming in or heading to the dressing room for a bit?”

“I might as well pop in with you. I have nothing to do today anyway.”

We make our way into the meeting and sit with the rest of the writers. Once we have finished up writing today’s show and have been through the table read me and Portia make our way to my dressing room to drop off our things and have some dinner.

A few hours later…

Portias POV

*Knock, Knock*

“Ell!” We hear Mary shout from outside of the door.

“Yeah, you know you can come in!” Ellen shouts before Mary pops her head around the door laughing.

“We’re ready for rehearsal if you are?” she asks.

“Yeah sure, we’ll come now with you” Ell says standing and making her way out of her dressing room with me following. We are having a joke around with Mary when I hear someone shouting from the other end of the corridor.

“Ellen Degeneres. Well, well, well.” I turn around at the same time as Ell and see the smile on her face fall as her eyes fall on the face behind the voice.

“Anne” she says sharply.

“It’s been a long time. I have to say though your looking pretty good for your age.”

“Yes it has. Well thank you I guess. Anyway I have a rehearsal to be getting on with” Ell says and with that continues to make her way towards the studio. I have never seen Ellen act so coldly to someone before. However, I guess after what Anne put her through and her sudden reappearance and perseverance to get onto the show I can understand Ellen’s reservations. I still cannot help but feel a little sorry for the woman though if she really is trying to reconcile with Ellen so I give her an apologetic smile and turn around to follow Ellen into the studio.

Chapter 5

Ellens POV

Walking out to start the show for real I can still see the look on Anne’s face when she greeted me before rehearsal earlier. I just know that she has something planned but it’s too late to back out now so I decide to just act normal and deal with it as it happens. As the show progresses I begin to relax a little more as I forget about the upcoming interview until I begin to introduce her.

“Welcome back. I used to know our next guest very well. Now she’s just got engaged for a second time. Please welcome Anne Heche” I say before standing and clapping her introduction. I want to look as friendly as I can on TV so the press don’t make any new stories up about us. I see her appearing through the corridor that leads backstage with a smile on her face. She walks over waving at the crowd and leans into me for a hug which I reluctantly let her pull me into. The crowd seem as enthusiastic as me that she is on the show and the applause doesn’t last long.

“Anne”

“Ellen”

“So how have you been?”

“I’ve been really good thank you. How about yourself?”

“Yeah I’ve been good. So what have you been up to in the last few years?”

“Well I took a lot of time out to spend with my fiancé and kids. I wanted to focus on my family for a bit yaknow?”

“Yeah”

“In my previous relationships, especially my marriage I never really took time off work to focus on the relationship as you will know.” Say says sarcastically. I decide to ignore the comment and not recognise it. After a few seconds she realises I am not in the mood to retaliate and she carries on talking.

“So this time I took some time out and have had a wonderful few years with my kids. But once we’re married I think I’m going to try getting back into work as the kids are a bit older now.”

“I heard you were getting married. Congratulations.”

“Thank you.”

“Any plans for the wedding yet?”

“We’re not sure yet. I had a relatively small ceremony last time so we will probably go a little bit bigger this time. At least it’ll be a bit more private this time though as the press generally don’t follow us as much anymore. Nothing like your wedding though.”

“I see. The press can be annoying sometimes can’t they?”

“Oh I don’t know Ellen. You and Portia seem to love the attention you get every where you go.”

“Oh I love the fans just not the press” I say feeling the anger begin to rise at Anne’s little comments but I keep cool thinking about how much worse this could be going.

“So how is Portia, Ellen?”

“She’s good thank you. So what have you got planned work wise after the wedding?” I say trying to divert the topic away from Portia.

“Oh nothing in the pipeline yet you could say but I have a few offers. But anyway I heard Portia had some surgery done what’s up with that?”

Chapter 6

As soon as the words left her mouth I felt my fists clench and I immediately as they say saw red. I looked over towards Portia who looked just as shocked as I was but through her shock I could see her mouthing ‘stay calm’ too me so I took a deep breath and looked back towards Anne.

“Well Anne as you know very well you can never believe what they say in the papers” I say.

“Oh but it’s not just the papers though is it Ellen. All of the Arrested Development fans have been saying the same thing and I have to say she doesn’t look too good in the new episodes.”

“Well I would just like to say to anyone who shares your views out there that Portia has not had any surgery. Not that it is any of your business Anne”

“Okay if that’s what you say Ellen. But a wig can only slightly alter a persons appearance and she looked completely different” Anne says and I see the sides of her mouth turn upwards into a smirk. As I see the smug look in her eyes I can’t control my anger anymore so I decide to take the show off for a break.

“All I can say is that she hasn’t had surgery, whether you believe that or not is up to you. Anyway we have to take a break now. Congratulations on the engagement Anne. –“ I say but before I can finish Anne interrupts.

“Oh come of it Ellen we all know you’ve probably both had surgery. I mean Portia looks like”

“Please stop filming” I interrupt asking Mary who is sat behind the cameras. I see her motion over to the cameraman and I turn my microphone off before I continue. “Anne I invited you onto the show because I believed you were coming with honest intentions but you DO NOT get to come onto my show and disrespect my wife like that.”

“Oh come off it Ellen we both know had I not have left you, you’d never have shacked up with that cow”

“How dare you speak about my wife like that!” I say feeling the anger rise up inside of me. “SECURITY!” I shout. “Please will you remove this woman from the premises, thank you” I say to Mark my security guard who now has hold of Anne and is lifting her out of the chair. I see her beginning to kick and scream as they start to take her away.

“It’s all true Ellen no matter how much you deny it!” I hear her screaming as she is taken away. I watch her go and before long I feel two arms turning me round before I am enveloped into the familiar arms of my wife.

Chapter 7

I nuzzle my head into my wife’s shoulder and the emotions poor out as I begin to sob into her shoulder. I feel her pull away and say something to Mary before pulling me off stage but I am in such a daze I’m not really sure what is going on around me. How could she do this to me? To us? I have so many questions going round in my head and I can’t help but blame myself for this as after all I had the final say on whether she was allowed on the show or not. Before I know it I am back in my dressing room and Portia has scooped me into her arms on the sofa.

“God” I sob into Portia’s shoulder.

“Shh baby it’s okay don’t worry” she says rubbing her hand up and down my back trying to console me.

“But it’s not Port I’m the one who let her on the show and all of those things she said about you”

Portia’s POV…

I can see how much what Anne has said has affected Ell she can barely talk through her sobs. I am trying to console her but I can’t help but be affected by what she had said. Do people really think I’ve had surgery to alter my looks? I never really look at the papers to see what people have been saying but this must be a big story. The make-up on the show was heavy and I had to wear a wig but I didn’t think it altered my appearance by that much. I can’t let Ellen see that it has affected me though otherwise she will blame herself even more.

“Hey its okay Ell” I continue to rub her back before hesitating, pulling her back from me and looking her in the eye. “Honestly, nothing she could ever say about me or you could affect me or us okay?” I see her eyes searching mine for any sense of worry or sadness and I hold my breath hoping that I don’t give anything away.

“Okay, as long as your sure babe?”

“Of course”

Chapter 8

It took Ell about half an hour to calm down before she was ready to go back out and continue the show. Mary had knocked on the door several times and I guessed the audience were starting to get impatient.

“Ell, I know it’s probably the last thing you want to do now but you should go finish the show. That way we can get home as soon as possible yeah?”

“Mmm” she moans. “I guess”

“I’ll go get Mary and tell her your ready okay?”

“Thanks” she says giving me a weak smile.

I head out of the door and down the corridor towards Mary’s room. As I am reaching the doors into the corridor Mary’s office is on I hear a door open from one of the dressing rooms behind me.

“Well, well, well” I hear and immediately knowing who it is. I toy with the idea of carrying on walking and ignoring her as I know in my head that’s what I should do but my heart is saying a different thing. I can hear her trying to torment behind me as I carry on walking but then she say’s something that makes me snap.

“So how’s Ellen? Being a baby is she?” she snarls as I turn around and march back up to her.

“Look I don’t know what your problem is but I think you should get your facts right before you go blabbering on national TV about the way someone looks. I don’t know what you were aiming to achieve but if it’s to try and split us up you have no hope in hell of that happening. Just leave us alone. You had her, left her and hurt her badly so don’t try to come running back claiming you were the innocent party. Goodbye Anne.” I snarl back before turning on my heels and marching back down the corridor to Mary’s office. I reach the door and let out the breath I was holding before knocking.

“Hello?” I hear from the otherside. I slightly open the door and slip in.

“Hi Mary, Ell’s ready to finish the show now” I saw slightly flustered after my previous encounter with Anne.

“Okay, thank you Portia. Are you okay? You seem flustered?”

“It’s okay, and I’m fine Mary don’t worry. Just don’t say anything to Ell okay?”

“Course I won’t what’s happened now?”

“I just ran into Anne in the corridor and we erm..exchange words you could say.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah she was just as pleasant as she was on the show.”

“I’m sorry Portia. It’s my fault she’s on the show. Her manager seemed so genuine when he said she wasn’t here to cause trouble.”

“No Mary honestly, no one could have seen that coming” I say smiling at her weakly. “Anyway lets go get the show finished and then I can take Ellen home.”

Around an hour later the show was recorded, the audience had finally left and Ellen had run through the editing process with the team. She wouldn’t usually do this but she wanted to try and cut out part’s of Anne’s interview that invaded our privacy. Obviously she couldn’t cut it all out as she would have a complaint from Anne’s manager but she recorded a quick end to the interview to bring it all together. We were now finally in the car heading home. I had offered to drive after the day we’d had. Since the encounter with Anne in the corridor I hadn’t been comfortable, what she had said was starting to get to me but I couldn’t let Ellen know that. I think she had already sensed something wasn’t quite right so I tried to make mindless conversation on the way home to cover up my insecurities.

Chapter 9

Ellen’s POV…

Thursday Aftenoon…

It’s been a few day’s since the interview with Anne and I am starting to calm down a little. As was expected the press went crazy for the interview and have spent the last three day’s camped outside mine and Portia’s home expecting some kind of comment on the interview. It was decided that I would talk a little bit about it on today’s show to try and calm the situation down so we could get on with our lives. I’ve noticed Portia hasn’t been herself since the interview aired and I know how much she hates the media so have planned a little surprise to take both of our minds off it this weekend. Once the show is all recorded I grab my things and head to pick Portia up from her afternoon meeting with all the stuff for our surprise hidden within the trunk. When I pull up at the office I can see Portia waiting inside the reception trying to conceal her identity and failing miserably. I park the car and head in to let her know I am there.

“Hey baby” I smile looking at her. “You know if your trying to stop yourself being recognised your not doing a very good job, in fact your drawing more attention to yourself by pulling that scarf to your mouth” I laugh.

“Hey” she laughs.

“You ready to go?”

“Yeah sure let me grab my things-“

“No, I’ll get them Port” I say interrupting her, picking up her bag and heading out of the office to the car.

“So baby, I have a little surprise for you”

“Oooh, I thought you seemed a little happier today Ell”

“Well, I just want to put it behind us yeah?”

“Okay” she smiles weakily.

“So we’re not to mention it this weekend, this is our weekend okay Port?”

“Yeah, sure”

Around an hour later we are pulling up to the Villa in Palm Springs that I have hired for the weekend.

“Wow baby, this is amazing” she says stepping out of our car onto the driveway.

“Only the best for you baby” I say walking around the car and wrapping my arms around her.

“Thank you Ell, this is just what I need” she says before turning herself around in my arms and placing a soft kiss onto my lips. “I love you”

“I love you too Port”

Chapter 10

I am sat by our private pool whilst Portia has gone to take a shower, after her swim, when her phone starts to ring. I look over towards the table her phone is sat on too see who is ringing but the number is unknown.

“Portia, Baby your phone is ringing!” I shout as I walk through the villa towards the bathroom so I know she can hear me.

“Who is it?”

“It’s unknown shall I answer it, it could be a sales call I can get rid of them for you?”

“Yeah sure, if it’s important tell them I’ll ring them back”

“Okay” I say walking back outside to take the call.

“Hello?”

“Answering Portia’s phone are we Ellen? Can’t trust her?” I hear the familiar but unwelcome voice on the other end of the phone.

“Anne” I spit out angrily. “How did you get this number?”

“Oh well, I wouldn’t tell you that now would I?”

“Well please don’t ring us again neither of us wish to talk to you.”

“Oh I didn’t plan on having to ring you I was happy to leave you be after the interview I got what I wanted but now I feel as though Portia owes me an apology so I’m not –“

“Excuse me?” I interrupt. “Why would Portia owe you an apology?”

“Oh she hasn’t told you? Well I guess that’s up to her to tell you then isn’t it” she says smugly before I hear the phone click off. Before I can process what Anne said I hear Portia returning outside.

“Who was that baby?”

“Er- Anne” I stutter out my brain still trying to catch up with what Anne said. I look over at Portia and see the panic written on her face but I’m not ready yet to find out what Anne was talking about as she was probably lying so I pretend I got rid of her swiftly. “But don’t worry babe I got rid of her before she could say anything else. I’m a bit concerned about where she got your number from though so I’m going to go give my manager a ring.”

“Okay” she says looking a little worried.

Chapter 11

“Hi Chris, it’s Ellen”

“Hey Ell, what’s up?”

“I just wanted to ring you and let you know that Portia just got a phone call on her mobile of Anne. I know it’s difficult to try and block people finding out our number entirely as she probably knows people who know it but if you could try and block her from contacting us that would be great.”

“Oh gosh of course Ell, I didn’t realise she had access to either of your numbers. I can get Portia a new number if you want me to?”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to be too much trouble though I know it’s a weekend and you’re not working.”

“Sure Ell no worries, I’m only doing some gardening anyway. I’ll only have to make a few calls and it’ll be sorted. It might not take effect for a few day’s though so if you could give me the number Anne rang on I’ll get that blocked as well.”

“Yeah sure, hang on let me go and grab her phone” I say whilst walking back out to the patio.

“Babe, can I borrow your phone to look at Anne’s number so Chris can block it?”

“Sure babe” Portia say’s whilst passing it to me from the table next to her chair.

“Everything okay?” she mouths quietly and I nod in response before giving her a reassuring smile and heading back inside.

“Sorry about that Chris, Portia had her phone outside”

“Ah no worries Ell”

“Anyway yeah the number is 818-800-1122. If you could block it on the new number when that comes through that would be great thanks.”

“No problem. I’ll drop you a text once it’s all sorted in a bit”

“Okay thanks Chris”

“Sure thing Ell. Catch you later.”

“Byeee” I say putting the phone down and heading back outside to join Portia.

The Next Day….

I decided not to confront Portia about what Anne had told me yesterday as I didn’t want to spoil our weekend so I am waiting until we get home today. I really hope what Anne said was wrong because I really hope Portia could of trusted me enough to tell me what had happened. After we have unpacked our weekend clothes I head to my office so I can ring Mary and confirm some of the arrangements for tomorrow show. Once we have finished on the phone I get so distracted by checking my emails, catching up with some more work and making more phone calls that before I realise it’s five o’clock. I walk through into the kitchen expecting Portia to be cooking us something nice for tea but to my surprise she’s not there.

“Portia baby” I shout through the house.

“In here” she shouts back from the lounge. When I walk in she is sat on the sofa checking her phone.

“You okay?”

“Yeah sorry I got distracted and didn’t notice the time. Are you okay Ell you’ve been in that room all day and you haven’t seemed right since Anne phoned yesterday?”

I sigh and take a seat on the sofa realising that I have to confront Portia about what Anne told me.

“I’m sorry babe, I know I shouldn’t be asking you this because I should trust you but it’s just something Anne said yesterday”

“Hey, it’s okay. What did she say?”

 “Well…” I say hesitating. “It’s just she muttered something about you having to apologise to her for something and when I questioned her about it she said that you should have told me” I ramble. After I say this I see Portia shuffling uncomfortably as she begins to sigh.

“God, I’m sorry Ell I know I shouldn’t have done this.”

“Hey just tell me yeah?”

“Okay” she says before taking a deep breathing. “So after the show the other day I was on my way to fetch Mary from her office and I ran into Anne. I tried to ignore her Ell I really did but she started saying stuff about you so I snapped.”

“What did you say to her?” I look at her shocked as it’s not like Portia to snap so easily.

“I just kinda went up to her, got in her face and had a bit of a rant at her. I told her that she should get her facts straight before telling people on national TV that I’d had plastic surgery, that she should stay away from us and I kind of told her that she’d had you once and messed it up and to stop making herself out as the innocent party. I may of also accused her of trying to split us up.” she says before giving me an innocent look but I am so angry about what she has said to Anne that it doesn’t work on me this time.

“Why? What did you achieve by doing that?” I shout.

“I’m sorry Ell I really am. I didn’t mean to do it I just go so angry”

“For god’s sake Portia if that got into the papers I’d look like such a hypocrite. You let her get to you. That’s the one thing I’ve always told you not to do”

“Ell please, I’m sorry I know I shouldn’t have done it I just got caught up in the moment.”

“God, I can’t talk about this now. I can’t even look at you without saying something I’ll regret.” I say before storming out of the lounge and grabbing my car key’s off the side.

“Please Ell don’t drive when your this mad.”

“I’ll be back later” I say before slamming the front door and getting into the car.

Chapter 12

I drive out to a spot overlooking LA that I used to come to when I was trying to get my head around losing my career all those years ago. I marvel about how little has changed then find a bench to sit on. It’s relatively quiet up here as by now it’s about 7 o’clock so most people are having their tea. I think back over what Portia said as I begin to calm down. I can’t believe Portia would snap so easily but thinking back about how fraught our emotions were that day I don’t believe that if I’d been in the same situation that I wouldn’t have done the same. In fact the more I think about it the angrier I get with Anne and not Portia. After a while I decide that I need to go and see Anne to find out what her intentions are with this whole charade. I know it probably will only make things worse but I need to see that this is her fault and not Portia’s. I ring around some friends asking if they know where she currently lives and eventually after about half an hour I manage to get an address. I make my way down her road searching for number 30. When I find it I pull up onto her drive to try and disguise my car encase someone from the paparazzi or public spot it as she lives in a pretty popular area for celebrity houses. I get out of my car a little bit shocked at the size of her house. I mean I knew she wasn’t a particularly famous person but knowing Anne I would have thought she would buy the biggest house she could afford but generally the house is pretty modest. I ring the door bell and see a man, who I presume is her fiancé, with jet black hair and muscles which make him look like a bodybuilder heading towards the door. Through the door I can hear him shouting through the house to Anne but cannot quite make out what he is saying.

“Ellen” he says rather harshly. “I hope your not here to cause trouble, our kids are in bed.”

“No don’t worry I’m just here to clear something up with Anne.” I say smiling a little too fakely.

“Ellen” I hear a cheery voice say from behind the man.

“Anne, could I have a word please?”

“Yeah sure come in” she says before leading me into the kitchen and ensuring that she is fine to her fiancé.

“Well, well, well, I thought you’d never come” she says giving me a wink.

“Anne we both know I’m not here for that.” I snap and give her an angry look.

“Oh” she says faking disappointment. “So what are you here for then Ellen? I thought you ‘never wanted to see me every again’?” she says using her hands to show her quotation.

“Oh fuck of Anne. You and I both know why I’m here. Don’t play the complete innocent.” I never usually swear but this woman is making my blood boil.

“Oooooh swearing are we Ellen?”

“Look Portia told me everything Anne. I know you provoked her and maybe she shouldn’t have accused you of trying to split us up and that so I do apologise for that but that doesn’t excuse what you did.”

“Oh come of it Ellen I hardly provoked her and I don’t need you to come apologising on her behalf she’s not a child.”

“But that’s beside the point Anne I just don’t understand why you’re doing all this? What are you achieving from it?”

“Yaknow I’m going to be honest here. I did come to try and I dunno put the past behind us but then I saw you and I just couldn’t help but taunt you. You get under my skin Ell more than anyone else. Maybe that’s because you were one of the best things that ever happened to me and I ruined it. I mean we were good weren’t we Ellen?”

“Thanks for your honesty Anne I really appreciate that but we were over the minute you walked out. I thought you were it though Anne and you broke my heart. I can’t ever get passed that with you. We could never put the past behind us and I really hope you can now see that.”

“I guess but yaknow Ell I’m not even sorry. I can’t even explain why but I’m just not.”

“Well that’s your problem Anne. Can you please just promise to never come near us again? Especially Portia?”

“I suppose. But for the record Ellen you really could do so much better than her”

“She has a name Anne and I’d really appreciate if you didn’t insult her in front of me.”

“Oh come of it Ellen she’s only fucking after your money why are you so blind”

“God Anne, I really thought we were having our first adult conversation there but I really don’t think your capable of that are you?” I say turning to leave.

“You really are blind aren’t you. She married a man for a green card Ellen. I mean seriously she’s a slut she’ll fuck anyone to get what she wants” she snarls back at me and I see red running back into the kitchen, raising my fist and pushing her into her kitchen island.

“What the fuck did you just say?” I spit at her grabbing her by the collar with my other hand but before she gets chance to respond I feel someone pull at my shirt from behind and a fist hitting my face before everything goes black.

Chapter 13

I begin to regain consciousness and the pain hits me like a freight train. The ground beneath me feels hard and I realise I’m not in Anne’s house anymore. I open my eyes to try and get a hold of my surroundings but all I can make out is my car next to me. I immediately panic that I have just been left on the driveway and that Anne’s fiancé might be coming back to me so I sit up suddenly before realising that I have been dumped with my car in a car park in the centre of LA. After the adrenaline from the panic wears off the pain throughout my body begins to throb and I collapse back onto the ground before I pass out. I slowly reach for my phone in the pocket of my jeans and dial Portia’s number. I hear the dial tone click off as Portia answers.

“Oh my god Ellen where are you?”

“P-Port” I manage to groggily say through the pain.

“Ellen, are you okay?” she asks and I hear the worry in her voice.

“B-babe” I say before pausing to catch my breath. “C-can you call an ambulance and come to M-Merchant street Car Park” I say using all of my energy to speak.

“Oh my god Ellen I’m coming” I hear her say before the phone click’s off and I loose consciousness again. The next thing I am conscious of is a car pulling onto the car park before a door opens. I immediately panic that someone has come back for me before I hear Portia shouting my name and immediately I feel safe.

“Oh my god” I hear Portia cry as she runs around the car to the side I am lying. “Ell” she says before reaching down to hug me. I feel the tears from her eyes running from her face onto mine.

“P-port” I say pausing through the pain. “I-I’m s-sorry”

“Hey, Ell please don’t. It’s fine I should never of confronted her babe. All I’m focused on now is you okay? The ambulance is on it’s way yeah?” I move my head a little to show her I have understood as I don’t have the energy to speak.

“God Ell” she says looking down my body at the cuts and bruises. She hug’s me loosely and we just lie there for a while just holding onto each other. It break’s my heart to see how upset she is and how she is blaming herself for this but I just don’t have the energy to explain to her that it’s not her fault.

“I’m just going to phone around tell people to meet us at the hospital okay babe?” she says whilst getting her phone out. I watch her calling all the various people as she gets more hysterical by each phone call. By the time she calls her mom she can barely speak. I try to reach out my hand to her as she puts the phone down.

“Hey you, I’m coming. Keep still.” She says pointing at me as she realises what I’m trying to do. I look into her eyes and give her a slight smile as she lets out a little giggle at what I was trying to do. Within minutes I hear the sound of the ambulance pulling onto the car park but as Portia stands up to wave them over the sky begins to spin and once again I am plunged into darkness.

Chapter 14

Portias POV…

I put the phone down shaking uncontrollably. I can’t believe anyone would do this to Ellen. I still can’t help but think this is my fault though. If I hadn’t of let Anne get too me none of this would of happened, we could of carried on ignoring her sarcastic comments. But I let her get to me and now Ellen is lying here barely able to move. I am roused from my thoughts by hearing Ellen gasping for breath. I turn around and see her trying to reach out to me as she can see what a mess I am.

“Hey you, I’m coming. Keep still.” I say pointing at her before kneeling closer and grabbing hold of her hand. I let out a little giggle and sit there for a few minutes just holding her hand and comforting her before I hear the faint sounds of the ambulance from down the street. I stand up and begin to wave as the ambulance pulls into the car park so they can see me from the other side of the car.

“Over here! Please hurry!” I shout to the crew as they jump from the ambulance. I turn back to face Ellen and realise she has lost consciousness but before I can do anything the crew are around her assessing her injuries. Everything happens so fast I feel like my mind is working in slow motion.

“M’am” I hear someone asking but I am too lost to respond. I feel two hands grasp my arms at the same time as the person speaks again. “M’am please I know this is hard but we need to know if she has any known medical conditions” he says shaking me violently. I somehow manage to reply to the man and ask what they are doing.

“We’re just going to but her onto a spinal board for the moment just to be sure that if she has broken any bones in her spine or neck that we are moving her as little as possible. But please don’t worry this is only a precaution. We need to move quickly though incase she has any internal injuries that we can’t see. Is it okay for you to help me roll her so we can get the board underneath?” I manage to help the ambulance crew and before I know it we are arriving at the hospital.

Half an hour later…

I am pacing up and down the floor of the waiting room nervously just hoping for someone to come and tell what is happening. The last half an hour has been a complete blur. We were rushed into the hospital, down corridors and into a ward but almost as soon as I ran into the ward following Ellen a man asked me to move to the waiting room as there wasn’t enough room in the emergency room. Since then I haven’t heard anything from anyone and the poor lady on the reception desk in the waiting room is beginning to get more and more annoyed with me. I must look like a complete madwoman to the other people in the room as I pace the floor muttering to myself.

“Portia! Oh come here!” I hear from behind me as two arm’s wrap me into a hug. I collapse into the arms of the woman who has been with me through everything. For the first time since I entered the hospital the tears begin to stream down my face. “Oh Port, she’s going to okay yeah?”

“I j-just w-what if she’s not mom” I scream as by this point I am crying so hard I can barely breathe.

“She just will be okay? Call it I dunno Motherly instinct” she laugh’s trying to lighten my mood. I force a small smile through my tear’s before burying my face back into my mother’s neck. Within the next hour or so the rest of my family and Ellen’s family arrive. Betty is just as distraught as me and we have both spent the last hour constantly jumping every time a doctor enters the room to call a family through. I am trying to be strong for now though for Betty. Finally after what feels like forever the doctor I saw earlier appears through the double doors and I jump out of my chair as I recognise him. I hear the rest of the family jumping up behind me in anticipation of what the doctor is about to say.

“Is she okay?” I ask confidently but inside I am terrified of what his answer is going to be.

“Mrs Degeneres?” he ask’s looking at me.

“Portia please” I interrupt.

“Portia” he says giving me a weak smile. “We have checked your wife over using a number of scans. We discovered some internal bleeding but managed to stop that pretty quickly which shows some encouraging signs. During the X-Ray’s we also found that she has broken her right arm, which we place into a sling, and a couple of ribs which will explain why she was struggling to breathe. We also believe that she suffered a few blows to the head but nothing has come up from the scans we have undertaken but as you can understand we would like to keep her in for observation just over the next few day’s to ensure she has no underlying problems. Overall she has been very lucky. However, I did have to inform the police due to the nature of how she was found so she will need to give a statement when she wakes up.”

“That’s fine, I will happily give one too but can I please see her first?”

“Of course Portia. Unfortunately I would like to reduce the amount of visitors for the moment until she wakes up.”

“Of course, is it okay if her Mama comes too?”

“Yes that’s fine. If you would like to follow me?” he turns gesturing toward the doors. I grab Mama’s hand as we make our way towards Ellen’s room.

Chapter 15

As we reach the door to Ellen’s room the doctor informs us he will be back to check up on her later and that she should wake up from the anaesthetic within an hour or so. I thank him as he walks away to go and take care of another of his patients. I look through the little window in the door almost hesitating to enter and the image I see breaks my heart. Ellen is lying almost peacefully but the bruises, cuts and tubes surrounding her show just how seriously injured she is. A tear leaves my eye and I feel a hand placed on my shoulder.

“Come on, lets go be with her” Betty say’s sympathetically. I slowly open the door trying not to make any noise as if she’s sleeping. Betty follows me in and we both take a seat either side of the bed. I take Ellen’s limp hand in mine and begin to stroke it. We both sit in silence for a few minutes taking in what has happened over the last few hours.

“Hey, Ell” Betty say’s trying to hold back her tears. “Everybody’s here yeah? We’re all just waiting for you to get better.” She pauses as the tears momentarily stop her from speaking. “We love you Ell. Whoever did this is going to be punished!” I walk around the bed to comfort her. After what seemed like forever but was probably only 20 minutes Betty decides to go and tell the family that she is doing okay leaving me alone with Ellen. I reach down and softly kiss the top of her head trying to stay calm but inside my head is swirling with things I want to say and ask.

“Hey baby, your mama’s just gone to go tell everyone your okay. I’m not sure whether you can hear us or not though. I-I love you and I’m sorry for losing my temper with Anne. If she did this to you I’ll never forgive myself. I shouldn’t have let her get to me like you said. God Ell look at you.” I stutter out and begin to sob. I am so lost in thought I don’t hear Vance enter the room and he almost gives me a heart attack when he puts his arm around me.

“Jesus” I say before realising who it is.

“Sorry Portia, you were in your own little world there weren’t you?”

“Yeah Sorry Vance”

“Don’t worry about it. God how can someone do this to her?”

“I know”

“Im sorry to ask this Port but the cops are here and want your statement. I know it’s not the right time and I’ve tried to tell them you won’t come but I had to come ask?”

“Seriously?! My wife hasn’t even woken up and they want my statement? You can tell them where to stuff it!” I say angrily.

“I’ve already tried that Port”

“Seriously? Do they have no consideration for anyone else? I’m not leaving this room so if they want a statement they’ll have to come here!”

“Shall I go ask if they can do it here? If not though Port I’ll be here with her the whole time and any sign of her waking up you’ll be the first to know”

“Can you go see if they can come here then I can discuss it with them?” I say calmly.

“Yeah that’s a good idea. I’ll be back in a minute” he says and speeds off to go fetch them.

Whilst waiting for Vance to come back I calm down a little bit. The police are only trying to find out who did this too my wife and they can’t do that without having statements off us both. I guess the sooner they get our statements the sooner they can find out who it was.

“Miss De Rossi?” someone from behind me questions.

“Mrs” I say rather sharply. “DeGeneres” I hate it when people who obviously know me and Ell are married don’t recognise it. I mean who doesn’t know? It was all over the papers.

“Sorry Mrs Degeneres”

“Just call me Portia” I say trying to remain calm before I get myself arrested.

“Okay Portia, we’re happy to have a quick statement off you here if you can come down to the statement in the morning once Ellen has woken up. If that’s okay with you?”

“Thank you. It’s just she hasn’t even woken up yet I don’t want to leave her.”

 “We understand, we’re only trying to do our job to find out who did this especially now it’s all over the news as you can understand we are under a bit of pressure.”

“No offence but just because we’re famous and the press are picking it up shouldn’t make you more eager to solve the case.”

“Erm..well yes obviously. But anyway do you-“

“Hang on a minute” I say the anger beginning to get the better of me as I stand up. “If the only reason you’re here so fast is because it’s all over the news then you can get out.”

“Portia calm down!” Vance shouts at me whilst grabbing both of my shoulder’s roughly. “Just get the statement done and they can get out of here okay?”

“Okay” I say reluctantly. “But I’m only doing this because I want to find out who did this”

“Right Portia as I was saying do you mind if we record this interview?”

“No that’s fine.”

“Okay” he says before pressing a button on his tape recorder. “Statement commencing 02:30am Monday 25^th February 2013 with Mrs Portia DeGeneres in regard to the assault of a Mrs Ellen DeGeneres. If I could start by asking if you have any information you wish to share that we might not know of?”

Half an hour later…

“Okay thank you Mrs DeGeneres we will be back in touch if we find anymore new leads but obviously if it does turn out to be anything to do with Anne Heche we will have to wait for Ellen’s statement before we can prosecute anyone or possibly even arrest anyone but we will do our best in the mean time.”

“Thank you” I say silently relieved that they are leaving. Once they are gone I turn back to Ellen before checking the time.

“Hey Vance is there any chance you could find the doctor I’m getting a little bit worried now.”

“How come Port?”

“Well he said she would be awake within an hour and it’s nearly been 2 now since I saw him.”

“Sure I can I’ll just go have a walk around see if I can find him.”

Chapter 16

The doctor explained to me that sometimes it takes longer for people to wake up from the anaesthetic dependant upon the nature of their injuries and how differently the drugs affect them. At first I was a little hesitant to believe him as I had a sense something was wrong but sure enough a little over an hour later and I feel movement from Ellen’s bed beside me. I shoot up and look over to see Ellen trying to open her eyes.

“Hey baby it’s me. Your in the hospital okay, don’t worry you’ve just had a small operation so don’t try and move okay?”

As she open’s her eyes I see her trying to give me a weak smile before lifting her arm to point at my glass of water on the counter behind me. I let her have a sip before explaining that I’d better go and find the doctor now she was awake. Once the doctor has finished checking her over he decides that Ellen should be fine to go home the next day so I drop everyone a quick text, as they went home to get some rest, to let them know she is awake and will be home tomorrow. I gently re-open the door encase Ellen has decided to get some rest but to my surprise she is sat up waiting for me.

“Hey you” she says cheerfully.

“Hey” I say walking over and perching on the side of the bed. “You gave me a real scare there.” I laugh. “I’m sorry Ell. This all my fault, I shouldn’t have reacted to her.”

“No Port, I’m sorry for going around to her house.”

“You went to her house?”

“hey calm down yeah? I’ll start from the beginning.” She say’s before taking another sip of water. “At first I just kind of drove around various places being angry at you but then I realised that you just reacted to Anne. Anne should have buried any resentment towards me long ago and shouldn’t be trying to come back into our lives. So I decided to go around and try and talk to her calmly and that’s what happened. I actually for a moment thought I was getting somewhere with her. But then she couldn’t resist taking another pop a-and I guess I saw red. I-I raised my fist to her and I dunno I don’t think I was ever going to actually hit her but what she said just got to me but before I knew it I was being tugged off her by her fiancé, a fist make contact with my face and then that was it until I woke up in the car park.”

I stay silent for a moment taking everything Ell said in. I know Ellen shouldn’t have raised her fist but how could someone do this? And what did they say to make Ellen do that?

“W-what did she say?” I say to break the silence but part of me really wants to know what she had said.

“Please Port don’t make me tell you. It’s all nonsense anyway.”

“Ell you can tell me anything okay? Please?”

“She-she” Ellen says before pausing and looking down at her hands. “She said that you married a man for a green card, were a slut and would fuck anyone to get what you want” she said so quickly I couldn’t make out what she had said.

“Ell baby you’re going to have to speak slower than that I didn’t catch what you said.”

“She said you married a man for a green card, were a slut and would fuck anyone to get what you want”

I sit there in shock for a few minutes not quite believing Anne would stoop so low. Although this is Anne Heche we’re talking about.

“Oh my god. Ell I would never do that to anyone you know that right?”

“Hey baby I know that okay. Of course you wouldn’t” she says. “Let’s not let what happened come between us okay?”

“Okay”

“Good now come here I want to have a nap with you safely in my arms before the police come knocking for a statement. The doctor said they were very prompt when they spoke to you earlier.”

“Prompt wasn’t the word!” I laugh before lying down next to Ellen and wrapping my arms around her waist.

After Story

I’m glad to say that Ellen made a full recovery in regards to her injuries and is now back regularly filming the show. Anne’s fiancé was arrested and sentenced to 5 years in jail for assault and Anne herself was sentenced to 2 years with 1 year’s community service. The detective in charge of the case was promoted due to solving the case so quickly which I’m sure he was delighted with. Six months on from the incident me and Ell are planning to renew our vows and live the rest of our lives without ever having to have contact with Anne again.